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Heathers

on March 23, 2017

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Sword and Sorcery and Cringe

I don’t know how I made it this far without talking about Ladyhawke. Honestly, that feels like a personal failure. This movie is everything I loved—and still love—about 80s cinema: weirdly intense, deeply romantic, a little bit cheesy, and totally unapologetic about it. You’ve got sword fights, star-crossed lovers, medieval curses, Matthew Broderick talking to himself, and a synthesizer score that somehow works even though it really shouldn’t. It’s the kind of movie that shouldn’t exist but thank the gods it does. Movies like Ladyhawke were a genre unto themselves. Not quite fantasy, not quite romance, not quite action—but somehow all of those things at once. They had a grit and heart that’s hard to explain to people who didn’t grow up renting VHS tapes with faded cover art and trusting the blurb on the back to deliver magic. (Spoiler alert: it usually did.) Let’s talk about Legend. You want to see a very young Tom Cruise battling literal darkness? Like, Tim Curry in full demonic prost...

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